Saturday, March 03, 2007
TO or NOT TO endure
it's so late at night already and i can't sleep. so many thinks to think about, so many to worry about and so many things more to be done. i'm farking sleepy, my eyes are actually dozing off. DARN. anyway, since i'm just waiting for someone's reply, i shall continue crapping here.
do you know the feeling when the person you love just let you down occasionally? It's something that you're getting used to it.. you are trying to to but it seems like it's never going to work. Instead of becoming more immune to it, your heart gets more sensitive.
Every.single.time the issue arises, your heart twitches around as if someone laid his hands on your heart and grasping it tightly while twisting it around. It really hurts eh? It makes you feel out of breath and dizzy. it makes your eyes stinged by hot tears and it can almost have you take your own life away. It's not something that you can just cure by taking Paracetamol or putting cream on your burnt skin. It's a pain that you can never grasp and heal it physically.
I'm having one of these damn feeling right now. the pain in my heart? Excruciating. I don't know where to start or why am i feeling this. I thought i should be numb to it by now. when he did something disappointing again just now, it really hit me right on my face. And heart. Maybe it's not his fault, it's my problem; i'm sensitive. God knows what happened to me.
I just wish that my endurance can last long enough till the right time comes. I wish he's right, it's soon. I don't want to imagine losing all these when it's so near.
ENough of crap, maybe it's really time to sleep. get my mind of things. nitey nite.