With this hospitalisation leave...

All of a sudden I felt that this hospitalisation leave is not so bad after all.

I can walk, drive and talk.
But not run, jump or do anything strenous.
Therefore this leave I have is not for me to be bed-ridden the entire time.

And with this, I have the opportunity to meet all the friends who I've not been meeting for a year or more. And oh yes, the number of friends that I've not been meeting is surprisingly ALOT.

With this leave, I get to spend time sitting alone, having coffee somewhere with my laptop and a book. I also did bumped into long lost friends this way.

With this leave, I get to know which friend cares more about me. I also realise who in work thinks i'm not hardworking enough, and even suspect that I'm misusing my MC.

With this leave, I have more time worrying about my personal dramas in life, only to realise I have been dedicating most of my thinking time to work before this. I also feel more sadness during this period. Personal drama is always sad.

With this leave, I have the chance to think of my health and how it had been sending little warning signals but I ignored. I also found out the unexplained cause of my minor health problems.

You see, it's really not a bad thing after all. Even my blog is more alive now , no?

I'm a Standout in life.

I am different from others. Everyone stand out in their own unique way.

Duh.

I'm the girl who used to blog about normal personal stuff involving relationships and daily updates, 4 years ago. I wrote in simple manner, very 'cincai' indeed. Not to mention, less sarcasm too.

Today, I'm Sammy, the one who blogs with a pinch of sarcasm because of the cruel reality in blogosphere.

My irrational entry regarding a race, several months ago, has contributed to my life-building experiences. I was not fully aware, nor exposed to the great power of internet until that incident. From what I was aware of, the audience of this blog were mostly my own friends. One stranger tripped over this blog, and news about me spread like wildfire.

Headlines of many blogs and Malaysiakini has my name along with the words 'racist blogger'. That instance, the traffic on my blog was massive, easily a giant as compared to the KL jams during peak hour.

Initially, I was angry at how things were taken out of context. Then I realised, it was the words I used and how I wrote it. The whole phone-stolen incident has brought so much anger, it killed my knowledge of international relations and sanity when I blog about it.

Wildfire keeps spreading and burning, comments and chatbox continuously being spammed with vulgarities; I was that near to going crazy. But, we're always told, 'All problems have solutions'. They're actually right!

I talked to everyone that's involved, publish a public apology and deal with the aftermath. The whole furore cease very slowly.

I am sorry for the mistake.
I solved the problem with as much dignity I could.
I was showed that the racial unity in Malaysia is still not strong enough.

I didn't stand out for my ability to create publicity overnight..
I didn't stand out because I was vulgar and ignorant.

I stand out because I have the courage and dignity to face any dilemma and solve it.
For me, it's about standing up to face the consequences, and going through it alive.

Retail Therapy for the bored.

With all the time I have, I revamped my blog.

Well, no major changes like template and such, but minor ones. At least the discriminating and vulgar comments in my chatbox is not there anymore. Looks much 'cleaner' now.

__________________

Here's a story of how I spent my day today.

Be warned, it's a typical girl's blog post. Clothes, shoes and what not.

Went to La Bodega, Bangsar to have lunch: Sandwich and coffee.

Tapao from Starbucks: Caramel hot chocolate.

Went to a few boutiques for retail therapy. This therapy is able to numb the pain of the wound for a while; until you go to the counter to pay at least.

Got all these stuff, including the ones I bought form Bangsar 2 days ago:

The stylo picket-fence shoe that I probably will never wear (Baci boutique)

Loose chiffon dress (Baci boutique)

Polkadot wedges (Da Choice boutique)

Gold bangle (Cat's whiskers boutique)

Pink & gold earring (Baci boutique)

Red and yellow top from Cat's Whiskers. Not featured in photo.

Btw, Cats Whiskers has sale of up to 70%.

I probably won't be shopping anymore for another 3 months, after this month.

Optimism not in favour

I have the time, the energy and in super-boring mood.

Then I happen to have a laptop and internet connection, faithfully serving me at the moment. (Well, maybe not the connection, it's Streamyx, go figure it out.)

And since I'm already living the life of a handicapped at the moment, might as well blog about the things I do to fill up my past time.

Correction, I am actually not that 'handicapped'. I could walk and drive now, although my walking style reflects my grandma's. But i said i am handicapped because they are people who limit me from doing certain things and going certain places.

The reason? I am a recovering patient and I should look like one. Or else, people would think I'm lying. HARH!

Hmmm, some of these people are classified as pessimist. Excuse them.


Imagine this:

"You're a doctor treating a patient that has cancer. Would you rather see him looking pale, tired and staying home most the time (because he IS a sick patient); or would you rather see him live his life happily & optimistic, being out there as if cancer is only secondary?"

Oh, haha!
Looks like optimistic-jolly-active recovering patients are not so welcomed after all.
Better watch how you behave when you're sick next time.

I judge by da cover, so what?

You know how sometimes ppl say don't 'judge a book by its cover' because we could be deceived by it?

The blunt truth is, even the person who believe it like a life-saving-guide does it unconsciously. hypocrite? not really, at least they tried.

I am one of the majority that does it consciously and willingly, but not to the extreme.

WHY?

I'm telling you, judging something/someone by its cover is the most useful tool in making fast decisions. Eventually, everyone does that when they need to decide and don't have many light years ahead to evaluate or let the devil/angel in them battle to the end.

so what if we made the wrong decision in the end? at least we learn more tips in doing that again next time!

Someone I used to know always say, 'The dressing doesn't matter because it's what you are that counts.'

I didn't agree. The first impression is of utmost importance. What they see in the real you is more of a support.

Conclusion? I think I win hands down if we're to debate.

note: this entry came about just because me and iris were hunting for books by looking at iys cover, at a book sale. LOL!

mobile is king!

i LOVE the technology when they tell you they have all sorts of apps
that can do various shit.

But you know what?

i HATE it when they don't function properly and failed.com when i
susah-payah downloaded and installed this little idiot apps.

It's a love-hate relationship, complicated too! story ends. *tut*

Know the limits and what not?

I realised I hadn't been blogging for a long time.

I knew what was the reason. Only ONE.

I am limiting myself to what I can and cannot write.

Ever since the whole drama of my blog controversy, I couldn't blog about personal things or upload photos of my whereabouts.
I couldn't blog about current news that's being debated by every blogger.
I couldn't blog about what are the upcoming events and parties.

Then yesterday, I logged in to my blog and felt annoyed by these reasons.
I was soooo annoyed I had to write about this today.

The million-dollar question, should I continue writing in this blog if I'm so limited by its history?