Tuesday, September 27, 2005

confusions: cleared

gosh..i tot i was going to lose a boyfren because of something i said out of my subconscious mind... the fact is out; he's not going to listen to what i told him. haha! i was so stupid to really believe he would ditch me just because i told him to ditch me before our 3-months if he doesn't love me. i couldn't stop thinking that having a guy like him is like getting the impossible. everyone knows it's not easy to find a really nice boyfren who meets up to most of our criterias. so now that i have one, it makes me think. what's the CatCH? there must be a catch somewhere... something bad about him that i don't know yet. hmm..i still couldn't stop wondering ya' know.. wouldn't you be if ur in my situation?

but heck..the point is, when i asked him the ditch-me thing few days ago, he was jokingly saying that he will ditch me in 10 days time! argHh... although he joked bout it, i was so scared. shits..the lesson i've learnt was not to have the fear of loss cos then people will take u for granted. i'm having the fear of loss now! what a failure i am! hMPH..*knOCks on the heAD*

today i got to find out that he wasn't really planning to do that in the coming ten days time. that donkey! made me worried for nuts.. however, i'm grateful. i'm not complaining! ngek ngek :p

enough of boyfriend already. anyway, after college today, i went for this job interview that kester recommended me. gosh..it was so scary. they're actually looking for a promoter for lacoste perfume. it's rm200 a day! the application form that i have to fill up, i have to write my height, weight, shoe size, waist n hips size.. what the heckK? they're looking for a model or what?? weird..

enough of work already. i'm not a workaholic! though i work and study at the same time.. and still wanna look for more part time jobs. philips is not offering me enough pay :p i need money for my new hp.. i still haven't saved enough. sobs... i feel so bad using my boyfren's palm phone cos the one he's using already went bonkers.. and i'm using his nicer phone. i mUST get my hp by next month!! i shall be determined.. err...try to be determined!

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